


beyond

by modernscience



Category: Her Name in the Sky - Kelly Quindlen
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-08
Updated: 2018-11-08
Packaged: 2019-08-20 15:05:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16558031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/modernscience/pseuds/modernscience
Summary: Hannah and baker through the years





	beyond

_(i) 2018._

 

Hannah has always liked dancing. She likes watching people dance — the way bodies would move along with the rhythm, not a care in the world about anything else, where everything is contained within the dance floor like a balled up energy glowing in the dark; sometimes brighter than the sun, other times warm and glowing. There’s something about it that always looks liberating, and she knows it’s not an illusion, too.

 

Most of all, she loves dancing with Baker.

 

Baker would jump into it after a huge grin and her declaration of how much she “loves this song” without fail. That would usually be her cue to join in.

 

The crowd looks ridiculous in a surprisingly endearing way, she supposes. People moving against and with each other in their Halloween costumes of choice — not a hot second ago she’d witnessed a Mummy and an Elsa grinding against each other before she turns away out of secondhand embarrassment. Everyone is lost in the music, the rhythmic beat thumping deep she can feel it reverberating through her whole body.

 

Hannah fixes her gaze at Baker. She’d taken Hannah by surprise by how effortlessly she could pull off being Tan; in her French-tucked white shirt and denim jeans and white Lacoste. Her tight updo has come loose now and long dark hair tumbles against her shoulder, strands of her spray-dyed silver hair glimmer against the lights.  
Hannah has stopped trying to understand long ago how Baker can make her heart feels like it’s going to burst any second, but tonight it hits her all over again: her stomach lurches, and all she can think about is kissing this person in front of her.

 

The song comes on, and Baker instantly jumps from her seat as she moves along with Foster The People, one arm raised just above her head as her hips sway from side to side. Hannah’s convinced she’s momentarily lost her goddamn mind at the sight.

 

“Han,” Baker giggles as she motions for Hannah to join her, “come on!”

 

There’s that split second hyper-awareness of her body and the way she moves, the kind that always lingers for a good minute or two when she dances alone or in a group before she tells herself to relax and give in. She hasn’t needed those so much lately.

 

Baker puts both arms around her neck, pulls Hannah close, seals it with a kiss as if asking if it was okay, if _she_ was okay. It steadies Hannah, and she realizes that every time she feels she’s that close to floating away it’s Baker who brings her back to the Here and Now.

 

They stay on the dance floor for multiple songs, hips against hips and roaming hands and quick pecks in between. She feels everything — the collective heat from people moving together haphazardly, Baker’s skin against hers, their lips and tongue and teeth meeting, bodies melting into each other, swallowed by the music. She feels people’s gaze, but that’s the last thing on her mind. Tonight they’re carefree.

 

* * *

 

_(ii) 2013._

 

The last thing Hannah wants to do after an 8-hour drive from Atlanta is to go to a college party. It had crossed her mind to voice this as they were getting ready, but she could tell Baker had been excited to introduce Hannah to her friends, so she relents, catching the words even before they’d escaped.

 

It’s a hot, humid evening in Baton Rouge. Hannah hates the way her dress clings too tight, hugging the parts she doesn’t necessarily want them to. Baker seems to sense her worries and gives her hand an assuring squeeze as they stood in front of the door for one last touch up.

 

“You look pretty,” she whispers, kissing the spot under Hannah’s ear afterwards. Hannah could feel the crimson blooming in her cheeks.

 

“Just pretty?”

 

“Okay you look… _astonishingly_ hot,” Baker sighs. “I can’t even comprehend, honestly.”

 

“You don’t look too bad yourself,” Hannah winks.

 

There’s a smug smile across Baker’s lips before she leans in to kiss Hannah again, this time on her nose. “I know.”

 

“Oh my God,” Hannah groans. “Insufferable.”

 

“You love my insufferable ass.”

 

“I do. Unfortunately.” Baker throws her a look as her hand flew to clutch her chest, seemingly appalled, but she could barely hold her expression before finally breaking into a huge grin.

 

It’s already in full swing, music blaring from all corners of the house. God, this means they have to practically yell throughout the evening instead of using normal, inside voice. Great.

 

Every single person they pass turn their heads towards Baker and herself, some giving them no more than a quick glance, others eyeing from head to toe. Then there are others who she swears were more focused on the fact that her fingers were laced with Baker’s, but she’s quick to dismiss the thought and blames it on her nerves.

 

Hannah hates the attention, and the way Baker grips her hand as they motion through the crowd makes her think she doesn’t like any more than Hannah does. If she’s honest, all she wants is to be in bed with Baker while they watch reruns of _Parks and Rec_ for the millionth time. There’s still Sunday, she thinks. Somehow it makes the whole thing somewhat less daunting.

 

From the corner of her eyes she sees a frantic waving of a tall brunette from across the room, motioning for them. Baker quickens her step. “There they are,” she says.

 

“Finally!”

 

“Sorry we’re late,” Baker apologizes. The girl waves her hand off at Baker. “You haven’t missed anything, trust me, other than the obnoxious music. Classic Sigma party.”

 

“Hannah, Courtney. Courtney, Hannah,” Baker says, gesturing in the space between the ladies.

 

“So nice to finally meet you!” Courtney envelops her in a one-armed hug straight away as if they were long lost friends. “This one here,” she says as she points to Baker, “has been going on non-stop about you!”

 

“Nice to meet you, too,” Hannah says, turning her gaze towards Baker who is trying her damnedest to hide her grin. “This one here has told me a lot about you as well.”

 

The rest of the group had carried on sipping their Solo cups, though Hannah could see some of the girls giving her a once-over once her name was mentioned. Baker goes through the motion again, mentioning everyone’s names — Dylan, Kelsey, Martha, Bailey, … Hannah’s lost the remaining since the sudden loud beat from the speaker drowned Baker’s voice — before she drapes her arm around Hannah’s shoulder and pulled her a fraction closer.

 

“Everyone, this is Hannah,” she says. “My girlfriend.”

 

If she goes by logic, it shouldn’t really take Hannah by surprise anymore as they’ve thrown the word around countless times, though never this way: a bold public declaration to a bunch of strangers without anything but pride. She thinks Baker said it with a hint of amazement, too — that Hannah is as much hers as she’s Hannah’s, that it is as real as it has ever been — and that’s when she knows the word hasn’t lost its magic. She imagines there will be more occasions like this in the future when the extended family and a larger circle of friends are thrown in the mix, but she stops herself before getting too far ahead.

Hannah feels herself blushing, warmth creeping from her cheeks and spreads over her entire body as she gives everyone a small wave. “Hi.”

 

Save from one guy (Trevor? Dylan? Who knows at this point) who yelled out, “Damn, Hadley’s got game!” everyone else welcomes her to the group with a casual nod of their heads or a simple wave. Hannah sees Courtney seemingly beaming with pride, and she’s silently thankful.

 

“I’m going to go get something to drink,” Baker declares. “Baby, do you want anything?”

 

“Um… I don’t feel like beer tonight.”

 

“Soda punch?”

 

“Yeah, sounds great.”

 

“Okay,” Baker leans in to kiss her cheek. “Be right back.”

 

* * *

 

_(iii) 2016._

 

Somehow, through relentless persuasion which resembles more like peer pressure in hindsight, here they are.

 

Hannah has to admit, though, that compared to other bars they’ve visited, this is more on the low-key side. There can’t be more than 10 people around, and Hannah is secretly glad she can have at least brief moments to herself.

 

Her graduation came and went like a blur. She heard her name called through the speaker, got up and got her diploma, hugged her parents who are “so proud of you, Honey!”, smiled through dozens and dozens of selfies and group photos before her friends finally disbanded and made her promise to attend a final party next week. She knows she most likely won’t be able to make them, but she’d nodded anyway. “I’ll try my best. I can’t promise I will, though.”

 

Joanie offered to take a picture of her to send to Baker. Her phone buzzed not 2 minutes later with a sad face emoji and a “badass. but so bummed I couldn’t be there for your big day” text. 

 

“That’s okay, I’ll be there for yours.” With a winky face, of course.

 

Her phone pings one more time, but Joanie waved her hand in front of Hannah’s face, so she didn’t get a chance to look.

 

“So,” Joanie said. “Dinner with Mom and Dad, and then I’m taking you out.”

 

“Where?” Hannah frowned, not liking the idea already.

 

“I don’t know, some bar. I found it online. It’s a new one, not like the seedy place we last went to.”

 

“Ugh,” Hannah groaned. “I really just want to sleep. We’ve got a 10 am flight tomorrow, remember?”

 

“Tamp down your enthusiasm, Han.”

 

“I’m just…” she sighed. “Tired. I just want to be in bed.”

 

“Well too bad for you, Grandma, cause you’re going,” Joanie said. When Hannah doesn’t budge, she tries again, her tone more pleading this time. “Come on, Hannah, just a couple drinks with your dear sister. I promise I’ll hold your hair later.”

 

She knew the likelihood of that is very, very small, and if anything it would be the other way around. But Joanie looked at her with her puppy dog eyes that Hannah, despite herself, ended up saying, “Fine. 2 drinks, max.”

 

An hour later and she’s on her third beer, the bottle already lukewarm against her touch as she finishes the last remaining amount with a single chug, and she realizes she’s broken her own promise. Joanie, though, doesn’t care. After her 3rd Vodka Red Bull she announces (a little too loudly) that she’s going to the bathroom, and so Hannah is here, nursing her fresh bottle, alone.

 

“Hey,” she hears a voice next to her. Raspy and unfamiliar that she ignores it at first, thinking he was calling the bartender. But she feels a tap on her elbow, and she’s shocked.

 

“Oh. Hey.”

 

The guy leans against the table and used his elbow to prop his head. “Don’t think I’ve seen you around here before,” he says.

 

“Makes sense, I’ve never been here before.”

 

He chuckles. “You’re funny.”

 

“Uh… Thanks.” Something about his presence and the fact that he smells like beer makes her feel a bit uneasy, not to mention a bit queasy.

 

“So what do you do? Are you new in town?”

 

“Um, no. I’ve been here a while, just never been around the area before.” She tries to be polite, but she knows herself enough to know it comes off as curt. The guy, for some unfathomable reason, doesn’t seem to quite get it. Maybe he does and chooses to ignore it. Either way, Hannah doesn’t really care.

 

 _Where the hell is Joanie_.

 

“I didn’t catch your name,” he tries again, and Hannah feels like she wants to hurl.

 

“I don’t think she gave it to you, Bud.”

 

“Baker!” Hannah exclaims. “What the…”

 

The guy looks genuinely confused now, his head swivels between the two of them. “Do you know her?”

 

“Yeah, I do, actually.” Baker closes the distance between herself and Hannah and gave her a full-on kiss on the lips. “Hi, Honey.”

 

“Hi,” Hannah breathes. “What are you — how did you — ?”

 

“Joanie wanted to surprise you,” Baker says, her cheeks blushing. “Well, I did, so I asked Joanie and your parents to help. I didn’t realize  _I_ was going to be the one surprised. Damn.” Behind her, the guy’s head slumps between his shoulder as he admits defeat before walking away, beer in hand.

 

Hannah rolls her eyes, "As if. He's got nothing on you." She kisses Baker again, peppering her cheeks before pulling Baker into a tight hug. “I missed you.”

 

“Miss you, too, Hannah-bear,” Baker murmurs, tightening the hug and burying her nose in the crook of Hannah’s neck before pulling away, a wide grin plastered across her face, no doubt pleased with herself. “Didn’t see that coming, did you?”

 

Hannah can only manage to shake her head before breaking into a smile herself. “Best surprise ever.”

**Author's Note:**

> so these two have been on my mind constantly ever since i finished the book. while there is no single coherent storyline, i know i wanted to capture the little moments they have together, hence these mini ones.


End file.
